manoj

I know several self-appointed experts (through the intangible relationship called friendship) who are of the opinion that once you have driven through the maniacal maze that is Indian traffic, you can drive anywhere else in the world. I used to agree with them until I analysed the situation more closely, thus becoming a self-appointed expert myself.

Upon this close analysis, I discovered that Indian traffic meanders along. It is almost impossible to find a straight stretch of traffic. This is especially within city limits, where people cut lanes faster than a hot knife through even hotter butter. Shining examples are the pioneers of zigzag traffic – the autorickshaw drivers.

Observe an autorickshaw in Bangalore and you shall notice that it moves not unlike a crab - always sideways, never straight. Unless of course, the autorickshaw driver is so drunk that he starts moving ‘unnaturally’ (read straight). So what should we do to these autorickshaw drivers? Dump them in the ocean where they can join their brethren? The answer is, “There is no answer!”

Indian traffic comes with its banes and boons, which we are forced to live with. The banes are innumerable, enough to be compiled and sold in volumes. There are, however, two heaven-sent boons.

Boon 1: It restricts ‘brain drain’, because the Indians who go abroad, especially to Western countries, find that they are unable to drive in foreign traffic. Foreign traffic is, more often than not, quite orderly and very unlike Indian traffic. (Of course, that is why it is called foreign traffic. Otherwise, it would just have been called Indian traffic).

Zigzagging has become an old habit and as the saying goes, “Old habits die hard”, and in a certain Bruce Willis’ case, it dies hard with a vengeance. Thus, most Indians are forced to return to their motherland for want of Indian traffic. We are addicted to it and there is no cure, no rehabilitation that can save us!

Boon 2: Ever heard of sibling rivalry? Well, Indian traffic has the power to induce brotherly qualities a mong motorists. Explicit profanities spew from mouths in all directions, thereby extending one’s vocabulary in every language known to man. In some situations, if a person hangs around the scene long enough, he might also get a basic introductory course to the art of street fighting, for free!

So, in conclusion, if you have ever nurtured dreams and aspirations of going abroad and experiencing a foreign way of life, I would strongly recommend that you employ a chauffeur here in India. Of course, by doing so, you are depriving your chauffeur of the en opportunity of going abroad himself; but in order to get ahead in this cruel world, you have to step on other people’s dreams and aspirations. Your chauffeur is a good start.

Author: S VENKATARAGHAVAN
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venugopal

Spot On...I think lane driving is not possible in our country.

Indiscipline driving on our roads sometimes looks like an untreatable disease.

karan

From my point of view...Lanes are for decoration only.

glenmp

I agree to all the issues as stated above...

lane discipline in our country is in shables. Zig zagging on roads... and even on the best roads we have in the country is a shame and disgrace. Drivers especially the cabbies take pleasure in breaking all the rules.

I personally will be taking to the admistration in my company to provide training to the cabbies. Zig zagging is an eyesore. happy to note that there are some who share my views.

But as citizens of this nation what is it that can be done? how long can we be individually patient to this menace on the road.

I personally have written to the Chief minister's office and also to the traffic police. As expected I have received no response or even an acknowledgement from them.

How long would we be having this discussion without a conclusion?

drkishor32

why we are thinking that not possible in india, every thing is possible in india but you have to work hard then every thing is possible in india